Author Topic: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........  (Read 4427 times)

Gen. Dreedle

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I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« on: October 04, 2011, 05:58:49 PM »
I know, y'all are wondering when I am going to get off my arse, and start making PCBs.

I said.....when I have both the need and the time.

The time has been hard to come by lately. (Notice of often I have been here lately?)

Anyway, that is not what is worrying me: you wondering when I am going to get a move on. What does worry me is all the other crap you guys are curious about.

Specifically: the crap you guys stick into Google, and find your way to my site.

(OK, maybe it isn't you guys, but the dorks at some other forum.)

(OK, let's assume that it really is them, and then you can laugh along with me.)

These are real search strings, that someone, somewhere, used to find their way to my vacuous site:

"hate audiophiles"
"i hate audiophiles"
"audiophile pointless"

OK, I get those......and maybe this one:

"cartman hate hippies sound"

But don't you have anything better to do? Sure, it could be some zit-faced 13-year old twit, who probably knows nada about audio, but I doubt it. No, since most of them look like this:

"jockohomo"
"jocko homo"
"homo.net"
"cell boards"
"i/v conversion"
"i/v converter"
"dac boards"
"i/v conversion pcb"
"oscillator boards"
"jocko homo dac"
"preregulator"
"simple i/v converter"
"spdif tx"

I am betting it is guys reading this place.

But how the hell does Google send you to me for crap like this?

"opa627 out of stock"

Where or when do I even mention anything about these op-amps? Hell, I've never even used the damn things! Yet Google thinks I know something about them.

(OK, maybe not fair to blame you guys for Google being schmucks.)

But I am going to blame this one on you:

"who did jocko homo work for"

Why the hell do you want to know, and why the hell is it any of your business? It isn't. Period. Get a life and don't rummage around in mine. Some folks would consider this stalking.

(OK, it could be some guy in some fer'n country, who does not like me, and wants to spread malicious crap across the 'Net about me. Yeah, there is one person who kinda sorta fits that description. He is probably reading this......he always seems to be reading my stuff......)

(Sod off, you git!)

And last, but not least.......this is the one that I don't get:

"scaring a cat out of heat"

What on earth does my site have to do with that??????? Nothing, of course.

But when you think of it.......if there was a way.......think of the enormous commercial potential.

But first, I gotta finish my other tasks. In the meantime, some of you guys need to chill out.

"Seriously!"
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2011, 06:00:17 PM »
I know........you guys are going "Man, we knew that you were wound too tight, but what has yer knickers in a knot this time?"

Well, maybe I need to 'splain something........

A few weeks back, I was talking to one of my famous audio designer buddies. He told me about a some rather disturbing e-mails that he had received from the adoring masses. Seems that people have told them that that have done research into things like:

"I did some research on your family name, and it seems as if your family has roots back to Basingstoke, in West Phalia.........etc."

("I didn't know that there was a Basingstoke in West Phalia.") [joke]

And other stuff like:

"I found out that you used to be married to so-and-so.....the world famous marine biologist......(or some other field, used for the purposes of illustration).......etc."

Uh, maybe we don't need or want to be reminded of that stuff. It isn't your business; it is ours, and it is in our past. So let's leave it there. None of this has anything to do with whether or not we know anything about designing electronics.

Like I said......some of this stuff borders on stalking. So, on behalf of me and some of my strange friends:

Please, get a friggin' life and butt out of ours.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2011, 06:01:06 PM »
EXACTLY!!!!!!!

How does that song go..........

"I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so..............."

Oh, wait........that one was probably done by B-B in Arizona. Sorry, I was thinking about all those PM63s I must be hoarding.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2011, 06:08:13 PM »
A buddy, who has absolutely no interest in audio, but still enjoys reading my rantings advised me to come clean on my true profession.

I am the Bishop of East Anglier.

Or maybe I should remind you of this, perhaps my most famous design:

"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2011, 06:09:18 PM »
OK, really only one. Embellished for the sake of getting more readers.

"audiophiles are insecure"

Yeah, someone actually searched for those terms. As true as it might be, and also amusing to think about, why do guys spend time in front of a monitor, plugging crap like that into a search engine? I don't get it. It is one thing to run across it in the normal course of things, especially since a nut like me wrote it in the first place expressly for that purpose, but to actually go looking for it..........I dunno. I must be getting old.

"You already are old. Why do you think you are so damn grouchy all the time?"

Good point.

Anyway.

If I didn't know better, I might think it was a former business associate. He was an expert at wasting time with such nonsense. His problem was he moved on to even more pointless time-wasting activities. Some of which landed him in big trouble. Which is why the proper term is "former".
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2011, 06:09:48 PM »
"Take off, you hoser............."

If you guys did Google for Jocko Homo Devo, that would be normal if you are under 30.

No, it is the guys who are dredging up our mother's and/or former wife's maiden name, and then telling us that you did it are the ones we worry about.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2011, 06:10:26 PM »
More bizarre search terms.............

"do nerds hate hippies"
"guys homo"

And my favourite..........

"perasites"

C'mon..........who out there is sitting around with nothing better to do than search such pointless nonsense?

But then, I am the dork who makes up the gobshite web content to begin with.

"If you make it, they will come."
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #7 on: October 04, 2011, 06:11:01 PM »
Can someone 'splain to me why we have to include "why I hate hippies" to "hate hippies" and "I hate hippies"? Don't you get enough hits off of any of the latter 2?

Add to that............."homo website".

Yes, I imagine that there are "homo" websites out there. I guess they are going to be very baffled by my rantings.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #8 on: October 04, 2011, 06:12:01 PM »
You need to get out in the sun.

This month's total of searches on my site. The last one cracks me up.

Hey, if you really want to know, you could ask. I probably won't answer, but you never know if you don't try.



1 4 16.00% jockohomo
2 3 12.00% jocko homo
3 2 8.00% i hate audiophiles
4 2 8.00% john curl blowtorch
5 1 4.00% cartman i hate hippies audio file
6 1 4.00% homo net
7 1 4.00% i hate diyers
8 1 4.00% jocko
9 1 4.00% jocko homo -devo
10 1 4.00% jocko homo kits
11 1 4.00% jocko homo rule of audio
12 1 4.00% jocko homom
13 1 4.00% parent directory or last modified or index ofavi or mpg or mpeg
14 1 4.00% site:net phase noise
15 1 4.00% sounds bits cartman i hate hippies
16 1 4.00% spdif tx and rx
17 1 4.00% the meaning of jocko homo
18 1 4.00% who is jocko homo at diyaudio

I can't wait to see what next month brings. Especially if I get off my butt and start making PCBs.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #9 on: October 04, 2011, 06:13:18 PM »
Maybe they don't have command of the English language that you do. I wonder how well South Park translates into other languages.

Speaking of which, and totally off=topic, and probably worth censoring............

One of the minor broadcast networks shows edited versions of South Park every week night. It is common for shows that go into syndication, as it is known, to cut a small amount of the content. This allows for inserting more adverts. Since a great deal of my time is wasted on pointless activities, like watching goofball animation, I get the opportunity to pick out all the clipped bits.

When it comes to South Park, there is so much foul language, that it leaves lots of places to shorten each episode. But I don't get how they decide what is too coarse.

The 2 that I don't get are in the same episode:

"Blood belching vagina" gets shortened to just "belching vagina". "Semen puking asshole" becomes "puking asshole".

How are those any less offensive, gross, disgusting, or just plain vulgar for the sake of vulgarity?

Yeah, I worry about me as well. I can remember total crap like that, but not what I had for breakfast.

Or if I even had breakfast. Getting old really sucks.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #10 on: October 04, 2011, 06:15:56 PM »
Maybe Google. Or some other search engine.

OK, 'splain to me how you type in Butch Dixon and get referred to my crappy little site. I poked around some (and is this gonna sound like a really bad pun, but............) but I think it has to do something with a.........a.........a................gay porny vid.

Yep, seems like that "homo" part of my moniker means nothing about monkey men, but instead with butt burglars. Oh well. Can't say that I am surprised in any way, but how do I show up in a search for any kind of porny vid?

And as if that was not bizarre enough...........

This has to take the cake..........

A search in Espanol!

Yep, looks like someone was looking for an index of glycemic acid in carbohydrates (just guessing from what little French and Italian that I know), but just exactly what the hell does that have to do with puny PCBs and my rants about The Pub?????

Search engines....................folks wonder why I get irate when they say "Oh, well, you can just Google it, and find out that way."

Google my @$$.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: I'm starting to worry about some of you guys..........
« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2011, 06:18:10 PM »
Uh........don't think that I do. But I might. If I do, the image one has to go. No reason for that one to be poking around.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"