Author Topic: When a problem comes around.................  (Read 4986 times)

Gen. Dreedle

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When a problem comes around.................
« on: August 13, 2013, 06:11:28 PM »
You can whip it.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Rickster338

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2013, 06:41:04 PM »
That is classic..It reminds me of a girl that asked my to take her to the prom in high school back in 1980

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2013, 11:39:54 AM »
You mean you actually knew girls, back in HS? And one even talked to you!!! Wow..................

The only time any spoke to me was when they went "Get away from me, creep!", or "Don't look at me, you little twerp!", or "Get any closer to me, and I will get my boyfriend to beat you up!"

40+ years later, they are so fat their hubbies don't want them, and they need someone like me to fix their broken techie stuff....................

"I remember you. You were that skinny girl that used to threaten to have her boyfriend beat me up, if I got too close to you when we were standing at our lockers..................which were side-by-side. And now you aren't so skinny...............where is your boy friend now?

"Yeah.............he isn't here. And neither is any other guy that just to fawn over you. But the creep is. And you need him to fix something that is broken. Yeah.............right.

"So, I'm supposed to forget about all the crap you gave me, back in HS. Just because I am broke, I am supposed to swallow my pride, and fix your broken stuff. Yeah.............

"Hmmmm...............none of your old boyfriends are here. Not only can't they fix your crap, they don't want you, since you packed on the pounds. Isn't that interesting.

"Well, tell you what..............I'll think about fixin' your stuff. But, it isn't going to be my highest priority. If I do decide to fix it, it won't be done ASAP. How's that grab you?

"But, while you're here..........what are you doing tonight?"
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Rickster338

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #3 on: August 14, 2013, 12:24:40 PM »
I love it ...the way that the wheel comes round , and it is great to be in the drivers seat"the heavier the bus the better for us." :D

seagreen

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #4 on: August 14, 2013, 01:02:44 PM »
Best posting of the decade! 
No double blind testing was used in the making of this post.

MystereoN

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #5 on: August 15, 2013, 06:27:13 AM »
Funny. You are describing my school days but I don't remember seeing you in my class  ;D

Even more funny is, how woman age quicker than men. Old chinese wisdom quotes "ideal age difference between men and woman is half of men's age + 7 years".

IOW, if you are 30, woman should be 22. If you are 60, woman should be 37.......
Never argue with a fool,
they will drag you down to their level,
then beat you with their experience!!!

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #6 on: August 15, 2013, 10:36:09 AM »
Women that are 37 probably still have kids in tow. No thanks!

Maybe that is why the answer to the Universal Question is 42. By that age, the kids will be gone, or worse, teenage hooligans.

Not sure I will make it to 70, though...............
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

MystereoN

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #7 on: August 15, 2013, 01:04:09 PM »
Women that are 37 probably still have kids in tow. No thanks!

Why not? This is the best part, you don't need to make your own kids. This is the hardest part, I did always sweat like crazy during that "making kids" period  ;D
And you can go away without obligations if you don't like them  ;D With your own kids, you can't just walk away. You must take care for them and pay for them.

Joke aside, I was 13 when my mother married 2nd time. Today, I like my stepfather more than my own father.
7 years ago my wife and I got separated. We are back together now, but during that "2 years separation time" I meet few single moms and they were taking good care of me....but this is another story, not for public forum... ;)
Never argue with a fool,
they will drag you down to their level,
then beat you with their experience!!!

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #8 on: August 15, 2013, 01:28:38 PM »
OK, if I am not interested in having kids of my own, why in the hell would I be interested in having to deal with ones that I did not make?

Besides.................too broke to support myself............don't need anyone who is looking for someone to support them coming 'round my place.

I'm just like Alice Cooper:

"So I gotta find a woman with a car and a job.
And a house..................with cable."
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Rickster338

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #9 on: August 15, 2013, 03:42:48 PM »
I have to say that I agree with  General Cartman on this one, kids can be costly and time consuming always wanting...gimme gimme..gimme ...at least thats what my friends say.

seagreen

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #10 on: August 15, 2013, 05:36:08 PM »
A guy I work with has two kids.  One 5 1/2, and the other 2 1/2. 

He finally decided to talk to a financial advisor last week.

The finance guy told him that he should expect to have to pay 1.2 million dollars to send both kids through college.  Total - not each.  (What a load off!)

But, since nobody else in his age bracket is saving for college, the adviser thinks that college costs will crash.  Nobody will be able to pay for college by the time his kids are old enough.
No double blind testing was used in the making of this post.

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #11 on: August 16, 2013, 08:54:04 AM »
The costs won't crash. The gubbament will continue to make $$$ available, at a lower-than-normal rate.

"But even if they do that, it will take forever to pay off a student loan."

You are correct. What will happen is that kids will become indentured servants to the gubbament. Which is the goal, of the present regime, and all their socialist progressive left-wing commie pink-o cohorts.

But, you will be able to stay on your parents' heath care insurance, and that is empowering!

But Big Brother will be kind and generous. They will absorb the costs of your useless degree in Renaissance Spanish Literature, once you accept a job at the gubbament.

(Of course, you will be paying for it with 2/3 to 3/4 of your income going to taxes, but they know most folks will be too stupid to be able to figure that out. And since they will have made everyone equally impoverished, you won't notice it.)

Sound far fetched? We'll see. I won't be here, to collect on the bet, but you know I'm right.

C'mon..............you don't really think they will let all the institutions of left-wing brainwashing, er, ah.........I mean higher education, go out of bidins? That would not be good for their bidnis.

Which is the bidnis spreading the misery, equally, so everyone will look to Uncle Sugar for their sustenance and existence.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

Rickster338

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #12 on: August 16, 2013, 09:35:42 AM »
Wait a minute General...Do you really think that the gubbment would really be so generous as to let us keep as much as one  quarter to one third of our income? That sounds pretty optimistic, and maybe if you're lucky, you will be able to afford to eat after you  pay for health insurance. Why would you need higher education? All of the good jobs will be outsourced...Wait I almost forgot .....You'll need that higher education for that cushy gubbment job to pay for the student loans. Then the libtards with cry"tax the rich..ther not paying their fair share", and then....drum roll...you will be taxed until you qualify for gubbment assistance.

Gen. Dreedle

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #13 on: August 16, 2013, 04:23:48 PM »
Sure! They have to...............

If Uncle Sugar takes all of it, there will not be any left over for the state and municipal gubbaments.

Besides, if you only have to cough up 75%, imagine how good you will feel about yourself when they gouge the evil rich for 98%!

Which is the whole point of a "progressive" tax rate.
"Major Danby, sir."
"Danby. D-A-N-B-Y."
"Take him out and shoot him."
"Sir?"
"I said take him out and shoot him. Can't you hear?"

MystereoN

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Re: When a problem comes around.................
« Reply #14 on: August 17, 2013, 05:27:00 AM »
Yeah, you Americans are funny people. Healthcare and education are considered privilege, weapon is considered your right  ;D
Never argue with a fool,
they will drag you down to their level,
then beat you with their experience!!!